“Its done” continued…

“It’s done,” she thought as she scrubbed her husband’s back. What? What’s done?

We touched on this in class but ran out of time to ponder the possibilities. The woman wants to be there when they get a new house boy, she explains, revealing that she called the house when her husband was out.

“It’s done,” she said, for the first time hearing her own voice, and feeling the certainty within it.

Some classmates thought that she would end the relationship. “It’s done.”

Others thought she would move back, she being certain of the change. “It’s done.”

The newly found weight that rested within her words brought to her throat a sudden grasp of control. Of reality. No more pretending. No more imitation.


It’s done. This playing. His girlfriend. This or that fake love, according to her.

Within her words I translated them to be:

This is done. We will be a real couple. We will have something true. Whether you like it or not, your flings are over, and it’s time to get serious.


This chapter brings us this moment as a boiling over of the slow brewing search for what is real. From the masks to relationships, the wife protagonist is revealing this questioning.

Any remaining thoughts on this dynamic? Would you do the same if you discovered your partner was unfaithful, but you had an opportunity to continue faking it?

On the flip side – imagine what one would do as a ‘Big Man,’ – with a partner on another continent that you only see just a few months out of the year? These stories are true: one night my host mother in Ecuador cried to me that she knew her husband, a resident of Spain for 11 years, had a woman there. What can one say? Is it possible to salvage these relationships?

The struggle that comes after such time away seems too much to bear, but the unknown can be just as painful, as we have seen in ‘imitation.’


Posted on November 20, 2014, in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. Comments Off on “Its done” continued….

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